Wednesday, September 24, 2008


In this modern age of instant communication and finger talking (Texting) at what point is this cheating when you see your significant other talking to the opposite sex? This question cannot be easily answered especially when your not able to see the communication that are doing. What can be done and what are the signs on Texting Cheating?Here are the signs your spouse is cheating thru the means of texting.1) Phone is never left alone (Your spouse will make a point of making sure that phone is glued to there persons at all times.) As with my case my wife always sleeping on the couch during these months with her cell phone under her pillow.2) Phone is left in the car at night to charge. This is another sign there is wrong doing. Why in the car of course they forgot it there. do not be fooled.3) The phone bill is never seen. Yes this is another sign something is going wrong where is that phone bill every month? Or they will make it paperless so it never comes at all.4) You are not able to log in to the online phone site to see what is going on, as with many providers you are able to see daily call list and texting list. Make sure you are the primary holder on the account and your spouse will not be able to lock you out of the online details.5) You have access to the online bill but with most providers if you choose unlimted texting the texting numbers are not listing unless you specify for them to show up. Make sure you check with your provider to make sure you can enable this option.6) Your spouse is constantly texting, as the case with me going thru this, my wife made me believe she was texting her friend sitting right next to me when actually she was texting her new found boyfriend.7) You see names on the phone which you do not recognize, this is how my wife did it, disguised his number with a made up friend on the phone or in this case it was under police which was the truth but unfortunately it was the boyfriend (officer) and not the actually police station.Well there you have the most obvious behavior something is not right with your partner, then the question is how many textes constitutes cheating? Well this is where you get alot of different answers, but in my case it was simple (3000 textes in 2 months from 6 A.M. to 10 P.M. is disturbing. Up to 60 a day a times.Personally anytime your partner is texting (which is obviously a form of talking) any amount of texting is wrong especially if there are keeping it from you. Lying about any amount of communication between you and your partner is cheating no matter how you slice it. And why texting instead of calling? Well when you phone is on silent as my wife did, it goes totally unnoticed by the trusting partner. And is easy to answer even when your next to them. Bottom line if you suspect there are cheating thru the means of texting following the above steps mentioned and if you get your partner stopping you from accessing the phone info you can believe they are up to something.

Sunday, September 14, 2008


During the period of adolescence, the individual adolescent begin to exhibit some sexual behaviors. Among these behaviors are dating, attraction, love and premarital sex. These are briefly discussed.
DATING BEHAVIOUR: Dating is a period which precedes going steady. Dating may lead to courtship. It is a period when adolescent begin to meet and discuss on future relationship.
Dating behavior then means how adolescents of opposite sex carry themselves during dates. Suffice to note that many researchers have worked extensively on dating. They have concluded that dating does not take place in a particular time of the year.
Obviously, we have so many types of dates among these are; MOVIE DATE,LUNCH DATE,DINNER DATE,FELLOWSHIP DATE, PARTIES DATE ETC. Generally, when dating is to be made, the male will ask the female if she will not mind to go on a lunch date with him. The manner of request varies. The most important is that whoever is asking should be polite and modest.
During dating, men are expected to pay or finance the dates. The expectation of men from ladies during dates is that ladies do not eat or drink too much. Topics for discussion in most cases are raised by men. This is not to say that ladies can not raise topics, but if such is done, the lady must be cautions.
ATTRACTION; This is the extent to which the physique of that individual appeal to the opposite sex. It is very apt to remark that adolescents dwell so much on attraction. Some girls prefer tall, slim fair etc while some guys prefer dark, busty or sizeable ladies. Although, preferences differs from individual to individual, adolescent seems to forget the fact that beauty is like a fading flower.
L O V E ; This is the bond of affection between two people. In this context, between two people of opposite sex. There are different types of love.. EROTIC LOVE, AGAPE LOVE,PHILEO LOVE, STORGE LOVE, PHILIA LOVE, PRAGMA LOVE, LODUS LOVE,MANIA LOVE, STARGE LOVE.
EROTIC LOVE: Affection with sexual intercourse.
AGAPE LOVE: Unconditional love – Gods own love.
PHILEO LOVE: Conditional love. STORGE LOVE: parent/child love affection.
PHILIA LOVE: Solid friendship etc. Suffice to say that love has varying styles. PRAGMA LOVE: Most practical aspect of love. LODUS LOVE: Playful styles of love . MANIA LOVE: These love can lead to death-too possessive. STARGE LOVE: Being best of friends.

COURTSHIP: Courtship take place after dating and it precedes marriage. This is a period where the couple learn more about their family history, temperament and compatibility. Learn to understand each other in preparation for marriage.
In other to understand each other, the couple embark upon series of test. Among these tests are namely: TIME TEST- This test the ability to keep to time. EMOTIONAL TEST-This is to test the extent to which one of the couple is emotionally stable. This could be done through deliberate provocation of one another. Other types of test during courtship are DATING TEST,QUARREL TEST,HABIT TEST, SHARING TEST ETC.
Pre-marital sex simply means sex before marriage. It must be born in mind that adolescent is in the period of exploration. The expirations is not unconnected with the hormonal secretion during adolescence. This hormonal secretion increases the sexual drive of the adolescent. This is very natural and normal. Inability to withhold this drive causes an adolescent to seek gratification which more often leads to sexual intercourse before marriage.
These are briefly explained thus.
CURIOUSITY; Remember that adolescents are very anxious to know a lot of things including sex. They wants to know why mum and dad cuddle each other with their room under lock and key. They want to taste and want to feel. This ultimately lead to sex before marriage.

PRESSURE: Adolescent may give in to pressure from peers. According to Papilla(1990) She said many fail under pressure to engage in sexual activity even when they are not ready for it. Most often than not, the pressure to engage in pre-marital sex or early sexual activities are socially based.
MEDIA: Today teenagers quest to watch television set, pornography in computer, obscene pictures in newspapers and magazines etc increases adolescents urge for sex. It must be noted that there is increase in frequency with which sexual matters are being addressed on television through movies and video cassettes. Records even send out more sexual images.
PARENTAL UPBRINGING: The first teacher of a child is the parent. Children learn mostly by imitation. They imitate what their parents do. If parents are promiscuous. Tendencies are that adolescent from such environment may be exposed their parents’ sexual activities.
LACK OF GUIDANCE AND COUNSELING: Where adolescents lack proper guidance and counseling, could lead to early sexual activities, hence premarital sex. If adolescents are not well guided in their sexual behavior, this may lead to premarital sex as they may not know the implication of what they are doing.
PURSUIT OF CAREER: Where individual is pursuing work or career. This may lead to delay marriage. The implication is that such individual uncontrollably engages in sex before marriage.
CULTURE: In some parts of Africa countries, some culture places premium on early marriage thus exposing children even at pre adolescent level to sexual activities. Such culture value the number of children individual have more than life.
When sex is not done in appropriate time and stage, there must be its consequences. Some of these consequences are grave. These are;
DISEASES AND INFECTIONS: There are series of diseases and infections that could be contracted by the adolescent during premarital sex. These are summarized as sexual transmitted infections(STI) Some of which are;gonorrhea,syphilis, etc. However, where not properly treated could lead to infertility.
UNWANTED PREGNANCY: As the name implies, the pregnancy is not wanted. Why this is because the individual at this stage is not ready.
FALL OUT OF EDUCATION: As a result, of this pregnancy, the adolescent stops schooling. The boy may also experience set back as there may be inability of the parents to cope with nurturing pregnancy and paying schools fees.
VISCO VIRGINA FISTULA: Early exposure to sex which may lead to pregnancy and ultimately child bearing have been documented as causing visco virginal fistula ( V.V.F) This is a very serious health problem ravaging the northern parts of Nigeria.
DEATH: The adolescent may want to wriggle out the guilt and shame that are associated with unwanted pregnancy by aborting it. This has resulted into death in some cases.
There is no doubt that the adolescents faces multiple of sex related problems. These are highlighted below;
ATTRACTION: As noted earlier in this write up, attraction is the extent to which the physique of the opposite holds appeal. It must also be mentioned that adolescent adore their body. Hence, they are mindful of their body image. They do this, because they want to be noticed by the opposite sex. They will do all they can to be attractive to the opposite sex. This invariably becomes problem to the adolescent who may not be able to identify natural beauty from man made one.
BURN OUT: When adolescents are dating, and they do this for a very long time without marrying there is tendency that they are bored. This boring situation is what is known as BURN OUT. This always happen when adolescent do not caution themselves and rush into a relationship.
PSYCHOLOGICAL AND PHYSICAL ABUSE: It is possible that adolescents suffer some psychological and physical abuse in their day-to-day sexual activities. Adolescent could be roughly handled. This could be psychological traumatic. Among those ways in which adolescents could be abused is through raping. Rape is when there is sexual intercourse without the consent of the partner whether the boy or the girl.
IGNORANCE ABOUT BODY LANGUAGE: Body language means the extent to which some part of your body responds to touch. The sensitivity of any part of your body that can SWITCH YOU ON. There is no doubt the fact that there are many adolescents that are ignorant of this. Hence, they fall victim of this. This has created problem for them

Friday, September 12, 2008


That a woman with menses is unclean and that menses is cause for shame…. How true are the said belief?

Without the slightest doubt, menses is not a sign of impurity or uncleanness and requires only ordinary hygiene. Like bodily perspiration does. In ancient times, before science advanced there was a false understanding about menses. People were afraid that a menstruating woman would contaminate food and those whom she contacted by something impure in her body. Because of these mistaken reasons they thought it best that she should stay alone on those days. A young girl should understand that while menses is very private matter, it is nothing to be ashamed of. It is a sign of her developing fertility.

The interval between the beginning of one menses and the next can be as short as twenty days or as long as two months or more. Few women have perfectly regular menses all the time and many very fertile women have completely irregular menses.

Painful menses is normal for girls and for young woman before their first baby is born. Let them at least be happy that they are normal woman. Tightness of the neck of the womb(the cervix) is the main cause of this dysmenorrhoea. In the act of sex, the penis stretches only the vagina and these cannot cure the painful menses, it is the delivery of a baby which cures dysmenorrhoea. The baby’s head stretches the cervix widely.

Taking something like two aspirin or panadol the moment any pain begins is quite enough for most girls, most of the time. If however a girls pain is always severe. She can prevent it or greatly reduce it, by taking treatment to reduce inflammation three days in advance of the menses. The simplest drug against inflammation is plain aspirin. In this case it is not used for its effect on pain and so must be taken in advance. Take two aspirin tablets three times a day for those three days. A girl must be able to discipline herself to be able to remember these. If the menses are not fairly regular she should get the book called billings method and study it to be able to forecast her menses accurately.

Monday, August 25, 2008


The sexual response of a woman can be divided into four phases, which are: excitement phase, the plateau phase, the phase of orgasm, and the phase of resolution. In these section now, i will be discussing the first one on roll, which i have stated above ( excitement phase)

Excitement phase: This is initiated more by bodily contact with the male than by visual stimuli, although the sight of an attractive male may play some part. Sexual arousal varies in women depending on the time of the month. Many women have a heightened sexual interest at certain times, often at midcycle or just before and during menstration, but no consistent pattern can be determined. Tradition has held that sexual intercourse during menstruation is dangerous because the tissues are more fragile and liable to infection, but probably really because of the old bible law which held a woman to be unclean during menstruatral circle.

This is unfortunate because some women are particularly aroused sexually at this time. There is no medical reason why a woman who desires sexual intercourse during mensturation should not have it. The tissues are not more fragile, nor is infection more likely to occur. There is no danger and the woman is not unclean.

The excitement phase of a woman tends to be slowerto reach its peak, and to last longer, than that of a man. During it her nipple become erect, and the areola around them become swollen dusky. Her clitoris increases in size, mainly in width, and ;lips around the vaginal entrance become softer and thicker as they become congested with blood,forming soft swellings. These changes vary in degree from woman to woman.

At thesame time as these events are occurring, fluid seeps through the layers of tiny cells which makes up the vaginal wall, so that the vaginal becomes lubricated. Two small glands which lie near the opening of the vagina also secrete fluid, so that both the vagina and the entrance become moist and slippery. If the man attempts to introduce his penis before the fluid has been secreted and the area become lubricated,coitus( intercourse) may be painful. This is one reason, but not the only one, for women"s partner to stimulate her by kissing and caressing her, until she is sexually excited. Simultaneously the tissues surrounding the lower one third of the woman"s vagina become swollen with blood, so that soft,warm,cushions form which will caress the man"s penis as it enters the vagina. john njikanama

Sunday, August 24, 2008

What You Need To Know Before You Buy A Hair Tonic

The boom in alternative medicine has not passed by the market for baldness 'cures': there are now more tonics available than ever, with advertising shouting of 'natural', 'herbal' and 'aromatherapy'. Many people's first response to hair loss is to purchase a tonic, and it is always possible that, from amongst the vast and varied range of tonics available in the shops and by mail order, you might be lucky enough to come across one that does some good. Many, however, make wildly exaggerated claims, which they 'prove' with testimonials and 'before and after' photographs with changes of angle, exposure and even hairstyle to create a false impression of hair growth.Scientific proof requires controlled double-blind trials - that is, trials in which one group uses the product and another uses a placebo, and neither they nor their doctor knows until the trial is over which they used. Of course, we do not generally require such a high level of proof before we make everyday decisions (nor are double blind trials easily applied to testing the individualistic prescriptions of much alternative medicine), but given the price of some tonics it is a good idea to question what 'proof' means in their advertising: it may mean little more than that the advertising standards people haven't caught up with this one yet!If in doubt, you could contact the company asking for more evidence to support their claims. Testimonials may, of course, be falsified, or selectively edited; in any case, many types of hair loss can cure themselves spontaneously, and even the loss leading to male pattern baldness can stop for a few years of its own accord. If the treatment being sold involves rubbing the scalp, or requires more frequent washing, it may be this rather than the product that is having the beneficial effect - hence the use of double-blind trials.Before you buy a tonic, check the ingredients (mistrust any that insist on the secrecy of their formula) and see whether you cannot in fact produce something similar at home for a fraction of the cost. Also check whether the tonic actually claims to promote growth: many 'tonics' contain alcohol (though it may be hidden - for example, herbal tinctures are made with alcohol), which has a drying effect that may irritate more sensitive scalps and coarsens the hair; these are in fact simply intended as a sort of emergency shampoo. Unfortunately, although alcohol does dissolve the oils that make hair greasy, it does not remove them, merely spreads them along the hair shaft - which is unlikely to improve the appearance of greasy hair. Dry shampoos are a better alternative. Other products actually adhere to and thicken individual hairs rather than stimulating any new growth.

How To Kiss...Make The Kiss Memorable! by Nic Roberts

Would you like to be a great kisser? I personally don't know of a single person that would say no. Kissing can be a hard thing to do until you get comfortable doing it, and while nothing can fully prepare you for a kiss, this may help you with some basics on how to kiss.
1) Once you're leaning in, things start to happen quickly. If you are nervous about the actual kiss, why not practice beforehand to master your technique? An arm or mirror could serve as useful tools to self monitor the feel and look of your kissing style.
2) Offer a mint, only after you've just had one. This can let the other person know what's on your mind, unless you offer them mints all the time.
3) Approach slowly and smoothly. Depending on your starting position you may need only to turn your head, or you may need to lean in a bit.
4) Experiment. Over time, you'll want to try a variety of different kisses for different moods and times. Change it up to keep things interesting.
5) As you near your partner's lips, maintain eye contact. You may want to close your eyes after your lips meet to really experience the kiss.
I hope you find these tips useful on how to kiss.

Hairstyle To Improve Appearance.

A person’s hairstyle is his crowning glory, whether that person is a man or a woman. Have you noticed a how a person changes his appearance with a change of hairstyle? Women often change their hairstyles to alter their moods. Women who experience depression will sometimes change their hairstyles believing that a new hairstyle will not only change their looks but how they feel about themselves as well.The changes in a person’s appearance due to a change in hairstyle can be summed up in one word - transformation! Nothing changes a person’s appearance and character more than a change of hairstyle, whether it’s a change of the hair color or a haircut.But as with make up, the foundation of a good hairstyle is a healthy scalp. Anyone who desires to change their appearance must start with the basic care of their scalp. While there is no compelling evidence to support the old saying that brushing your hair a hundred times each day will make you hair healthier, it may be a good tip for those who want to keep their hair healthy.Brushing the hair (although not exactly a hundred times), will have a good effect on your scalp. It is always advisable to massage the scalp to stimulate the hair follicles.A person cannot choose the kind of hair he is born with although it can be improve. Your hair type has been determined from the moment you were in your mother’s womb, since genes are the determining factor. Those with thinning hair problems have probably inherited the problem from their parents. If you experience excessive hair loss, do not fret because more hair will replace the hair that has been naturally discarded.Many women have a difficult time growing long hair. If you experience this, try using a mild shampoo and avoid too much washing as this will damage the natural oils of your hair. Brushing your hair and massaging your scalp regularly will help improve hair growth.People who have oily hair have healthier hair but this type is prone to becoming limp and dull. Contrary to common believe, oily hair rather than dry hair, is more prone to producing dandruff. Those with oily hair should use a cleansing shampoo and steer clear of conditioning shampoos. If you have dandruff, a hot oil massage will not solve the problem. Experts suggest using anti-dandruff shampoos. Others recommend going to the beach and washing your hair with the salty water to deter dandruff.No matter what hair type you have, or what kind of hair problems you are experiencing, there is always a corresponding treatment. So take good care of your hair because it can make or break your personality.